Vices we love: Day 3- Back to the future

Saturday, August 13, 2005

Day 3- Back to the future

On my last full day, we continued with the roundup of relations and I met with my godfather, Gus, everyone's favorite sixtysomething bachelor. No longer ace in the lovemaking department, Gus spent much of his fifties bemoaning an ear infection of unspecified origins. Because of my bout with encaphilitis when I was a kid, I cornered the market on ear infections. Everything that could be done to the human ear was done. Every drug imaginable was injected. Every tool, modern and ancient was used to probe my recalcitrant inner ear.

Gus, discussing the finer points of inner ear hygiene

With Gus, I suspect that his ear troubles also served to keep him occupied as he was freshly retired and the ladies no longer ran to him in reliable numbers. Fitting for a former engineer, Gus is the model of precision. 11:30 means 11:30, not 11:25 or 11:35. 11:30. If you show up at 11:31, you will get a twenty-minute badgering on how he got up very early that morning, freshly pressed his thirty year old pants, washed what was left of his hair just so, got on the Metro (but did not sit- seats are dirty, don't you know?) and came ALL THIS WAY to be here at 11:30 and now that it is 11:31 HIS LIFE IS RUINED. AGAIN. The thing is, he does this is an remarkably amiable way. I can't describe it but it's kind of like being lectured by Santa. (Although Gus is maybe 100 pounds on a good day because he has a list of 5,699 foods that he will not eat unless they are prepared to his specifications.) He took me to meet what I assume to be his current flame, a charming lady whose name I do not remember.

Somewhere along the way, Gus got it into his head that when I finish my contract in May 2006, I will move back to Budapest. (Which I may if wages rise 200-300% by then.) He promptly told absolutely everyone- my grandmother, the waiter, the taxi driver, the gypsy violinist, the car thief, the Indian engineer, the homeless guy in the train station, etc- that I, asiatown, will be back in the motherland in no time. Still, lunacy aside, he is a decent guy. I can honestly say that Gus is probably the only member of the male species that I ever respected.

I have considered returning and then remembered that I am still Jewish. This can be a real handicap when looking for work. Don't believe me? Check out this school. I can be the next Helen Keller and these guys still won't touch me with a bargepole. Being Jewish is no big deal in America (mostly- I have had more than my share of exceptions to this rule) but in Hungary, where the populance, under Szalasi, gave Hitler a real helping hand in '44, '45, this is huge. Sure, Jew-bashing is not politically correct anymore, but it was only a few years back when they were giving the Nazi salute at soccer matches over in Franklin township. (A district in Budapest.) On the other hand, with everyone from Indian engineers to Portugese grad students with questionable tastes in men moving to Budapest, it may be time to let the past go. I'll ponder that one.


Blogger The Bionic 1 said...

That guy has a BIG HORN.

1:22 PM  
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Anonymous Anonymous said...

State soldier's ambitions politically hit big snag
Normally, it would be the type of national exposure that a little-known, long-shot Arizona candidate for U.S. Senate could only dream about.

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2:14 PM  
Blogger asiatown77 said...

who are you people? What are you? Who moved the rock?

11:20 AM  
Blogger Lucecilla said...


yup Europe is a funny ol place. Put it this way. Hitler didn´t get far with the Danes. Wear a Yellow Star! he screamed. So everyone, from the King down to the dustman, Jewish or not, wore a yellow star. The Danes gave one big fat f*ck you! to the Nazis.

Notice though, that Hitler was most sucessful against Jews in the places where there was already a history of division and antisemitism. A lot of Polish people, on hearing a place with dodgy showers was being set up next door probably said something like "Cool! A new kind of Pogrom! And they told us the Germans were SOFT!".

And that whole "land without a people, people without a land" business on behalf of the Brits? Rubbish. Did the Kurds or the Gypsies get their own land? Nope.

Sometimes I get the feeling that the real reason behind the foundation of the state of Israel was this ...

Eisenhower: Goddamnit, we´ve got all these Jewish refugees that can´t go back home. Jo, you´ll have to take em. Most of them are nearly Russian anyway.

Stalin: Look, Adolf and I may have had our differences, but on this question Dolphie had it right. Mother Russia is already dealing with the ones we have in the way Mother Russia knows best ... and more would be messy, espensive and bad for our socialist paradice. Winston?

Churchill: Good Lord no! We´re not havin´ em. Can´t have the purity of English blood diluted any further. No, no. We need to find somewhere to dump them. Charles...?

De Gaul: Well, don´t they have a claim to a patch of desert under your control somewhere? Nothing but goats and people who don´t matter much?

Churchill: Great Scot! You´re damn right. Capital idea, Charlie. We can dump em all there, pull in the Old Testement, or whatever they call it, to tie up loose ends, and no one will hear from them ever again. Gosh, this foreign policy business is hard work. Anyone for the pub?

Europe is a hot bed of monstrous hipocracy. I keep wanting to send it a get-well-soon card.

2:49 AM  
Blogger asiatown77 said...

Ahhh it sucks but it is still home. Or as close as I will ever have to a home.

12:23 PM  
Blogger Cal-mo-dee said...

Churchill had nothing against the jews -that's a well documented fact. He hated Indians.

8:34 PM  
Blogger asiatown77 said...

Well that's MUCH BETTER.

1:11 AM  
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3:13 PM  

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