Vices we love

Monday, December 12, 2011

I don't like people. I don't like being around them, I don't like speaking to them, I don't like- especially- listening to them. I don't like listening to the lies they tell me, the lies they tell themselves, the promises they make, the breeziness with which those promises are broken, the total meaninglessness of every syllable they utter.

True, I can be very charming and nice and polite and blah blah blah. But my heart is not in it. Nothing means anything to anyone. There are no ties. Not social, not religious, not familial. People will love you at 9:02 and hate you at 9:03. This means you are always on your guard. No compliment is ever truly complimentary. No situation is ever safe. No job, school, relationship, promise or assurance is ever assured. And living with that day after day wears you down. Alone.

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