Vices we love: Recycling my greatest hits

Friday, June 24, 2005

Recycling my greatest hits

It is during times like these- and there are many times like these- when I feel the need to discuss some of my past employers so that the present situation does not feel as excreable.

Showing my lack of ethics, I worked on more than a few political campaigns. These were the kind of gigs that made you feel like you were accomplishing something and that feeling would compensate for the..um...lack of compensation. I finally clawed my way to the top and was invited by a young lady to manage her campaign. This is what transpired:

Middle aged Jamaican lass named Keisha. A bit the nervous sort and about the size of a toothpick but what the hey. Turns out she is running as a Republican in Harlem. Clever gal. We sit down on the stoop and hash out THE GREAT CAMPAIGN.

Me: "So where is your office?"
Keisha: "Oh my brother in law lets me use the basement in his antiques shop."
Me: "Huh. Who is your treasurer?"
Keisha: "My brother in law."
Me: "Wow. So do you have any fliers?"
Keisha: "Fliers?"

This goes on for about twenty more minutes. Finally we get down to STRATEGY.

Keisha: "So you're gonna win this right?"
Me: "WE are going to win this."
Keisha: "Oh."
Me: "Do you go to church?" (I'm a heathen Yid but this is Harlem and you're running for city council. Use some common sense.)
Keisha: "Not really."
Me: "Start."
Keisha: "Ahhh...um...where?"
Me: "Well there is ABC A.M.E, DEF A.M.E., GHI A.M.E. (this list goes on for quite some time.)"
Keisha: "And what do you do there?"
Me: "Just umm....listen to the pastor and uh...dress up, I guess."
Keisha: "I don't know. I don't really like black people." (I couldn't make this up if I tried.)
Me: "You're black."
Keisha: "I guess. Huh."
Me: "So start liking yourself pronto."

She got 25% of the vote. I made twenty bucks (I am not kidding-and she made me write a receipt for it) and let me tell you, I earned every cent.

Korea, have I told you lately how much I love you?

2 Comments:

Blogger Adalmin said...

To your entry:

I envision another Michael Jackson.

To your quest for details:

When porn is cheaper than food, then you probably have a big problem.

2:15 PM  
Blogger asiatown77 said...

Oh well- I need to lose weight anyhow.

2:26 PM  

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